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Hello Dear One!
Today’s Text: 2 Corinthians 9:8 MSG
God can pour on the blessings in astonishing ways so that you’re ready for anything and everything, more than just ready to do what needs to be done. As one psalmist puts it, He throws caution to the winds, giving to the needy in reckless abandon. His right-living, right-giving ways never run out, never wear out. This most generous God who gives seed to the farmer that becomes bread for your meals is more than extravagant with you. He gives you something you can then give away, which grows into full-formed lives, robust in God, wealthy in every way, so that you can be generous in every way, producing with us great praise to God.
Songs:
Here’s a fresh take on an old Rich Mullins song called Hold Me Jesus. “You have been King of my glory, won’t you be my Prince of Peace?!” Love it for a centering song.
Here’s a song that we’re loving for contemplation. “Are you the one from the stories of old, are you the one sent to heal and make whole?” Yummy! The lyrics are here.
Question for Discussion:
What are you dreading and how can we pray for you?
In your group:
I would suggest offering each person an agreed upon amount of time to answer this question, with someone working as a timekeeper. It is important that this time of conversation reflects the entire gathered community - even those who don’t usually share very often.
And as you close your time together:
I leave you with this blessing:
I release you in the power of the Holy Spirit into the world God so loves, to do justice, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with the God, who sees the goodness and grace in you and walks proudly with you.
Many blessings,
Carmen
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Notes:
Welcome Friend,
Today I want to talk about Dread.
First of all, I have a master's degree in DREAD. I am THE MOST QUALIFIED PERSON to talk about this. I have written many volumes in my journal on this topic – and they will never be published!
Cancer and Dread
As I danced with cancer, the thing I dreaded the most was a punch biopsy. It just sounds awful and I was scared. And what's funny, is that it ended up not being at all painful in the way you'd think it would be. And the information we got from that was and is a huge help in treating this kind of cancer. And afterward I had a little talk with myself about the amount of energy I had spent on DREAD in the days and weeks leading up to that procedure. Because I was ineffective at things that mattered because I was so focused on DREAD.
I dealt with a lot of fear about Radiation, and I had to do a lot of internal work before I could be scheduled. But it turned out to be really an interesting experience. I can't recommend it, but I can recommend not spending energy on dreading it. Because it wasn't worth the cost to my energy – which was already low.
The costs of dread can be huge.
Current Events
So we know there's been some movement politically in the last week or so, that's why I'm mentioning DREAD. And we know that there are difficulties ahead for our dear ones. We know about cuts to Medicare, Snap (food stamps) and we know that there will be greatly reduced access to healthcare. We know about these things, you can check Wikipedia for the overview if you want to.
Is it fair to say that we dread the changes ahead? Yeah!
Some of them don't kick in for a while, but we can start feeling the dread and worry and fear now. //Sarcasm font// We can wring our hands and shout our outrage now, right? We can put a lot of energy into some very negative emotions right now, and that may or may not really help. And it's exhausting.
There is a deliberate offense strategy of exhausting a perceived enemy, whether physically, mentally, or by eroding their resources and will to fight. This is absolutely deliberate. The exhaustion is deliberate.
So we need to be smart. And we need to manage our energy, our dread, fear, and outrage. This is not a sprint, this is a marathon.
Matthew 10:16 in the Message says it this way:
“Stay alert. This is hazardous work I’m assigning you. You’re going to be like sheep running through a wolf pack, so don’t call attention to yourselves. Be as shrewd as a snake, inoffensive as a dove.”
That “inoffensive as a dove” part I find challenging. I love a good zinger, a snappy Facebook Meme, but we both know that offensive messages don't lead people to transformation.
Food Insecurity
First, we can talk about the stories of Joseph in Genesis and the way he prepared for the food insecurity that they knew was ahead. The threat of migrant workers getting “disappeared” at work means they're not showing up for work. And the lack of workers already means fruit is rotting on the trees and in the field, that's happening now. So that means less availability and higher prices. We can talk in our communities about how to specifically prepare for the food insecurity that is ahead. We can study Joseph in Genesis 37-50 and take notes on how he approached the threat of famine and then we can get to work. And what a lovely group of Riverside Anabaptist Collective members in Pennsylvania do about this will be different than a small group in Virginia, or Iowa, or Oregon or wherever you are listening from.
Getting to work on a plan of intentional and focused generosity – will leave us with less energy to spend on dread. Amen?
Dread in Community
Secondly, working together to help meet needs out there gets us out of the house where we're tempted to regurgitate our worries and chew them all over again - round and around. That sounds disgusting, but that's the digestive system of a bovine. Friend, God did not make you a cow. Rumination will exhaust us and have negative impact on our health. I'm not here to shame you for ruminating, that wouldn't be helpful. I'm here to recognize that we all have concerns, but that we do better at facing them when we have a small close community of faith where we can pray together and God can do what only God can do.
During my dance with cancer I spent a good bit of time on YouTube during that “nadir” period. I'd get the chemo infusion on Monday and sleep the rest of that day. Tuesday – Thursday I would feel pretty normal. And by the time of the weekend, I'd crawl into my recliner later on Friday as the chemotherapy interacted with my system. By Monday I was usually ready to crawl back out of my recliner and get some things done. That period after a cancer infusion when your blood count is low, your energy, and immunity is low – that's called Nadir. That's the lowest point in the chemo cycle of treatment.
Gone Fishing
One of those things I discovered during treatment was a fisherman in Florida on YouTube. He'd put a Go-Pro camera in the water off of a pier in Florida and we'd get to see what fish were hanging out down there in the water. And then he'd choose his bait and go fishing for the one he wanted.
But what I also found fascinating was when he'd fish from shore. He would say “see that dark spot way out there?” He'd see a spot where the water was deeper and he'd just put everything he could into that cast to get his line out there – especially into that deep spot where a fish could be hiding. I was fascinated as time after time he reeled back in huge beautiful fish. And thankfully, he would get his hook out and then let them slip away in the water. It was amazing how he could cast his line out there such a long way...
If you're going to be a fisherman, it's good to know how to cast.
If you're a follower of Jesus, it's good to know how to cast.
And it's an image of a fisherman in my mind when I read Peter's words in 1 Peter 5:7:
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
Cast them! Throw them out like you really mean it! Cast them out there as far away as possible. Be intentional! Cast that dread waaaaaay out there.
And then get busy working on intentional focused generosity. Because God is the God of more-than-enough, and God is the God of generosity.
The Private Battle of Worry
Now we come at this expecting that we're just in this private battle. And we don't want to mention it to a Christian friend because they'll shame us for it and think you aren't very spiritual. And we're trying to cast our dread out there, but we get tangled in the line and sometimes we're just tired of casting and... we think of this sometimes as a individual thing. That rugged American individualism. Nope, the Bible was written in the context of community. There were fishermen among the disciples who worked together to fish. We read the text from our individualism but it was written from community. And so we bear one another's burdens by bringing our dread to the community and praying for each other and rolling the burdens off our shoulders and on to Jesus together.
I've always had this picture of old guy Paul with a couple of candles in a dark room writing his books of the Bible with ink and a feather quill. But seminary upended that image for me and replaced it with another perspective.
Picture this instead: as the community around Paul came together, they listened to the Holy Spirit and prayed for the Galatians. Then Paul wrestled the message of the community into text on a page, and the actual writing may have been done by a scribe. It was then sent to the community of Galations, likely with someone who would explain and interpret it for them. The Galatian community heard these words: “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” Galatians 6:2 As they looked around at each other, they knew they could walk together. They could come together and hear the dread they each came in with, without judgment. And they knew that the Holy Spirit would do something beautiful among them. And they would pray together and be refreshed and then go out and face the world again.
Wrestling with fear and dread was never supposed to be something that happened in isolation. And so as we recenter ourselves in community instead of individualism, we can roll the burdens off onto the strong shoulders of Jesus. Our shoulders were not made for the weight of empires. “We are weak but He is strong” Yes, Jesus loves me... it brings God great joy to trade our dread for mission and purpose. To take the focus off of ourselves, and live intentionally generous lives. And there are ways to be generous that don't have anything to do with money, amen?
I don't think that means giving to every 501c3 that sends you mail. I think the calling of generosity is to learning to keep an eye out for people who aren't ok, and then doing what you can to help. Giving to charities can be our way of checking the box, it can be performative, and it can keep the problems out there and far away for someone else to deal with. But I wonder if true generosity is closer and much messier than that? True generosity keeps an eye out for people who are carrying a great weight, and does something to help them.
It's so easy for me to see that God loves you, and wants to help you in your faith journey. It's super easy, I can totally see it for you. I have more trouble seeing that for myself sometimes, and so you can show up for me and I can show up for you. We can hold sacred space for each other to be healed even in those moments when we don't even have the energy to pray that prayer for ourselves. We need authentic transparent community where we can carry our dread to Jesus, where we can cast our fears far away, where we can bear the burdens of dread and fear together – making them lighter. Community is so important.
The Crawl Spaces of Life
I was listening to some mentors of mine talk about a difficult thing they'd been through. Their business failed and they lost everything. They described it as going through a crawl space in their lives, like a cave explorer goes through some tight spots to get to the large cavern beyond. Now I'm not a cave explorer, and you probably won't catch me in the crawl space under this house if I can help it.
As they went through the lean years that followed that horrible loss, they kept reminding each other that God was with them in that crawlspace as they crawled along not being able to see very far ahead or even really make plans. There were a lot of tears in that crawl space. And I believe Jesus was there every muddy elbow of the way.
Put it into Storage
One thing that helped was having a prophetic friend who told them to look around at what was outside of their control and then put those things in storage. It's such an interesting metaphor.
You take out the dread and have a good look at it. Can I fix it? Can I do anything about it? No? Ok, then I'm going to pack it up and put it in storage with God. Now, you don't visit your storage unit every morning and take inventory, right? You don't put it in storage and then keep going back again and again. You just put it there in the hands of God for safe keeping and keep it there. It's the kindness of God that when we can't do anything about the things we dread, or our outrage – we can entrust those things to God.
That doesn't mean we stay silent and docile. That doesn't mean we don't write letters to our Congressional reps. That doesn't mean we don't show up and be who we need to be. That just means we're not doing all that while wearing the weight of dread.
God is our keeper
Psalm 121:4-8 in the KJV
4 Behold, he that keepeth Israel (and here we're talking about the family of Abraham and not the modern secular nation state) shall neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper: the Lord is your shade on your right hand. The sun shall not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord shall preserve you from all evil: he shall preserve your soul. The Lord shall preserve your going out and your coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.
The Lord is the keeper of those things we put in storage. The Lord is the keeper of the things we can't fix. When we're going through the crawl spaces of life, we need to pack up things we want to dread and put them in storage instead. And then get busy helping someone. Intentional focused generosity is key here.
Well Carmen, we just don't have a lot to share right now.
Yeah, I get that. I totally understand. And as you talk to each other in your faith community, perhaps God will lead you to make some changes in your own financial ecosystem so that you live on a smaller portion of your income so that you can be more strategically generous. This is the opposite of greed. This shakes us loose from the love of money. And if that's where God leads you, then you'll want to hear this story again.
Jesus feeds a Crowd
My dad and I have talked about this story many times over the years, so this story comes from both of us. Do you remember when thousands of people were following Jesus and kept wanting to have him preach and heal them in Mark 6? The disciples were going to solve the problem by sending the people away. Maybe they were getting a little peopled out.
Jesus responded in verse 37: “You give them something to eat.” Now that's a challenge! Ok, so they freaked out a little at that and then in verse 38 Jesus asks them: “How many loaves do you have?” He is asking them to take inventory. So they go do inventory and come back with their answer – which is basically “not much!” 5 loaves, 2 fish. Then Jesus directed them to sit in groups. Ok, this is random but yeah, we can ask these folks to scootch into groups of fifties and hundreds. Then in verse 41 Jesus gave thanks and broke the bread. Then he gave them to the disciples to set before the people, and they ate and were satisfied. And in 43 the picked up the leftovers – 12 baskets of fish sandwiches. The number of the men who had eaten that day was 5,000 – so when you do actual math instead of patriarchy math - how many people was that? How many people made in the image of God had a good lunch that day? We don't know, but it's a lot more than usually gets a good lunch out of a couple fish sandwiches.
Friend, this miracle is pretty cool in the time and place where it happened. And it inspires us to ask God “do it again, Lord!” Because there's no way a small crew of God’s favorites in Erie Pennsylvania can meet the needs of their entire community in this situation. But God can. God can meet the needs of a lot of gentlefolk in the communities where each member of this collective are located.
We hear the voice of Jesus “You feed them” or as he said in John 21:15 “feed my lambs” or “feed my sheep” and the first miracle is that we decide to try. Now people who are paralyzed in fear and dread don't decide to try, they stay stuck in inaction. But the disciples did decide to try.
#1 They heard the voice of Jesus and decided to give it a whirl.
#2 Jesus asked them “What do you have?” and so they took inventory.
#3 they brought what they had and gave it to Jesus
#4 they made reasonable preparations. They got ready.
#5 they gave thanks and laid what they had before God. They didn’t focus on the big beautiful problem – they focused on who God absolutely is for us! They came to God – not with demands or a poverty mentality, but with gratitude.
#6 they began to distribute what they had and invested in people.
#7 they watched what God did with big stupid happy grins on their faces and they kept at it until everyone had enough. They got to be there as God met needs. Cause you see... we bring the obedience, God brings the increase. We can never confuse that – we don't bring the increase and God is not obedient to us... that's what we're not going to do...
#8 they picked up the leftovers. They wasted nothing.
This started out with 5 pieces of bread and 2 fish and in God's economy of grace and generosity – it became plenty. Y'all, that's the God we still love and serve!
Friend, the leftovers in one season become the inventory of the next.
I leave you with this challenge. Don't give too much attention to fear, dread, and the outrage. Yeah, feel it. But move on. Don't allow your strength to be sapped by negative emotions that just slow you down. Get your group together and look at what you have. Take inventory. And then get to work.
2 Corinthians 9:8 MSG:
“God can pour on the blessings in astonishing ways so that you’re ready for anything and everything, more than just ready to do what needs to be done. As one psalmist puts it, He throws caution to the winds, giving to the needy in reckless abandon. His right-living, right-giving ways never run out, never wear out. This most generous God who gives seed to the farmer that becomes bread for your meals is more than extravagant with you. He gives you something you can then give away, which grows into full-formed lives, robust in God, wealthy in every way, so that you can be generous in every way, producing with us great praise to God.”
That doesn't sound like people living with dread. That sounds like people who are living in the flow of God's beautiful kin-dom. Amen?
God is enough.
Jesus, thank you for the ways you transform our perspectives from concern to relief that you're on duty. You're watching out for us, you don't take naps. Lord, we wrap up these things that are beyond our control. We box up our fear and dread. There's a lot here that's broken, and wrong, and cruel. But we aren't beyond your reach. And the ones we fear are going to be most harmed – they're also in your hands. Increase our discontent in places where we need to see your truth. And help us walk out your amazing generosity in the world you so love. Amen.
Friends, I release you in the power of the Holy Spirit into the world God So Loves... to do justice, do love mercy, and to walk humbly with the God who sees the goodness and grace in you, and walks proudly with you. Amen.
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